• Self-Love

    Who Do You Think You Are?

    Who do you think you are? Are you the asshole who lives in your head? Are you the sum of all the stories your mind recorded over the years – the tales of triumph and woe, of successes and (mostly) failures? Are you Fear and Darkness, inherently rotten and broken and unworthy? Were you created to struggle and suffer, to toil uphill your entire life in a (completely unnecessary) attempt to atone for your sins?  Are you your preferences? Are you the color blue or the lucky number 27? Are you a skin tone, a diet, a number on a scale, a face in a mirror? Are you a job…

  • Buddhist Psychology,  Happiness & Well-Being,  Mindfulness & Meditation,  Self-Love

    What If You Could See Yourself through the Eyes of Love?

    What if you could see yourself through the eyes of Love? Of pure radiance, of bliss that shines so bright it blinds you. What if you held yourself in that gaze, rather than that of the mind, of ego, of limitation and negativity and at times, even disgust? If you could see yourself through the eyes of Love, how would your life change? What would you do differently? You would pursue every one of your heart’s desires, because Love would encourage you, support you, tell you that you are capable and worthy and brilliant. Love would whisper that there is nothing to fear and that everything in this world was…

  • Buddhist Psychology,  Coping Skills,  Happiness & Well-Being,  Self-Love

    Letter to A Newborn

    Dear Sweet, Beautiful Little Darling, Hello! Welcome to this world. You are a ray of sunshine transmitted into a human body. With a human mind and human thoughts and human feelings. Without these forms, this matter of mind and body, you – Little Ray of Light – could not exist on this earth. So here you are, and your journey begins. I’m writing this letter to you to help you along your way…let it comfort you in times of darkness and add sparks to your celebration when all is well. Some important instructions: There will be pain, Little Love. Sometimes small and dull and fleeting, and at other times, acute…

  • Buddhist Psychotherapy,  Happiness & Well-Being,  Men's Mental Health,  Self-Love

    The Secrets I Know…

      As a therapist, I have the honor of becoming someone’s “secret holder”. I get to peek into other people’s minds and hearts and I am always so humbled by this offering. Each client gives me the gift of witnessing Truth – of seeing the human condition in its purest, most raw form. My clients are brave warriors who have the courage to be vulnerable, to get real with themselves and with me. And through my work, I have the privilege of knowing something so real and so true and so comforting: that we are all the same. I get to hear the same stories and struggles, the same fears…

  • Buddhist Psychotherapy,  Coping Skills,  Mindfulness & Meditation,  Self-Love

    Coping Skills from a Buddhist Perspective

    I often talk with my clients about the fact that so few of us are taught coping skills as children. From the moment we are born, we begin to experience pain and distress but we aren’t taught how to cope with things that hurt – not at home, at school or in religious institutions. Rather, we’re told “It’s okay”, “You’ll be alright” and other well-intentioned but often invalidating platitudes when we’re hurting. It’s very hard for a parent to watch his or her child suffer, especially when he or she can’t fix the problem. So we all rush to make it okay – often because of our own inability to…

  • Coping Skills,  Happiness & Well-Being,  Self-Love

    Do You Love Yourself?

    For today’s blog post, I thought I’d deviate slightly from the more “traditional” teachings of Buddhist psychology. That being said, this topic can clearly be understood in light of Buddhist philosophy and is a topic that seems to not only come up in session quite frequently, but also serves as the root cause of so many of our mental health problems. In our Western society, we emphasize “doing” over “being”. Because we live in a competitive, fiercely individualistic culture, we attach value and self-worth to various tangible accomplishments and achievements – job titles, salaries, educational degrees, awards, material wealth, etc. In addition to this sense of being constantly “evaluated” and…

  • Buddhist Psychotherapy,  Coping Skills,  Happiness & Well-Being,  Mindfulness & Meditation,  Self-Love

    The Mind, Perception and Thought Detachment

    In Buddhist psychology, the mind is everything: our minds are both the cause of our suffering and the avenue through which to overcome it. The Buddha taught that “the mind is everything”, that we become what we think and that happiness depends solely on our thoughts, nothing else. On the flipside, the Buddha is also quoted as saying that “nothing can harm you as much as your own unguarded thoughts.” Through this perspective, our sense of well-being stems from perception, and from our ability to “detach” from our thoughts. Such thought detachment – also known as mindfulness – means stepping back from the constant mind-chatter, seeing our thoughts as clouds…