• Anxiety,  Depression,  Stress

    Peace Lives Within

    The Buddha said “Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.” I wonder what the Buddha would think if he were alive today, and could see how desperately, almost frantically, so many of us seek happiness in external things, experiences, people and situations. Renowned Buddhist teacher Pema Chodron calls this “if only” mind…one of the ego’s greatest tricks to keep us trapped in suffering. The ego tells us that happiness lives outside of ourselves, and that “if only” I had a (bigger house/better partner/larger paycheck/smaller waist size…you get the point), THEN I would be at peace. What a horrible trap! Our minds tell us that THIS moment, the one…

  • Happiness & Well-Being,  Stress

    Where Do You Find God?

    Where do you find God? Which is to say, where do you find bliss? Where is your Truth, the sense of deep peace and inner stillness that lets you feel your gentle exhaling heart? Do you find it hiking in nature? In the eyes of your pet? Does it live in your yoga class, on your meditation cushion or in the space between your breath? Do you find God as the sun sets, melting gold over a tired day’s landscape? Or is Love there when the sun rises, its roundness pregnant with the hope and possibility of a new day? Perhaps God lives in the changing of the seasons, the…

  • Anxiety,  Depression,  Men's Mental Health,  Stress

    Buddhism, Addiction & the Myth of Disempowerment

    Addiction can be viewed in various ways – from a psychological vs. physiological perspective, to the debate between whether or not there is a biological basis for addiction. Through my training, clinical experience and the lens of Buddhist psychology, addiction is not a matter of biology. It’s not some flaw in your design, some genetic mistake that predisposes you to a life of struggle and suffering. Rather, addiction is as incredibly simple (and insanely complex) as the brain’s inherent inclination toward pleasure and away from pain. I believe that as a society, we suffer from an epidemic of addiction. When I say “addiction”, I’m not referring to the most extreme…

  • Stress

    Therapy Session

    Hello, sweet child. Have a seat. Tell me about your fears. Your anxiety. Tell me about your sadness. And your shame. Your addictions and your demons. Tell me, sweet child, why you feel so unworthy and broken and unloveable. Empty the noise in your head, let it pour out into my lap. There. Now I can hold it for you. I can cradle all of your pain and suffering, all of the pieces of your broken heart. I’ll hold it like I would a baby bird with a broken wing: with love and tenderness and reverence. With respect for its beautiful fragility. Here, hold it with me. Take some. Some…

  • Anxiety,  Depression,  Stress

    Mental Health & The Holidays: Tips From Buddhist Psychology

    While the holiday season can be an extremely joyful time, many people report a rise in stress, anxiety and depression during the holiday season. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) found that 64% of people surveyed endorsed having the “holiday blues” (defined as “temporary feelings of anxiety or depression during the holiday season”). When it comes to the holiday blues, many possible factors are cited, including the added financial stress, time with family, old memories, and even seasonal affective disorder (SAD). Some “symptoms” of the “holiday blues” include headaches, overeating, excessive drinking and insomnia. If you search “mental health and the holidays”, you’ll find a plethora of articles detailing…

  • Stress

    What Chronic Stress Does to the Body

    Humble Warrior Therapy is a holistic, integrative approach to mental health, emphasizing the inextricable link between mind and body. This mindfulness-based therapy is rooted in philosophies of yoga and Buddhism, which both promote an extremely comprehensive notion of health. When we experience a certain state of mind, our physical body is affected (and vice versa). So what are the effects of chronic stress on our physical health? How does feeling stressed affect the various systems and functioning of our bodies? Read on to learn about some of the physical health symptoms of chronic stress: Headaches Insomnia Heartburn Weakened immune system Increased heart rate Risk of heart attack Fertility problems Missed periods…

  • Stress

    Stress & The Power of Perception

    Various theories on stress and the stress response exist. From a psychological perspective, stress is directly related to perception (good news for those in Buddhist psychotherapy!). Lazarus and Folkman’s “Cognitive Appraisal Theory” (1984) highlights the role of perception in regard to stress, demonstrating that stress is a result of two appraisals. In the first or primary appraisal, an individual would perceive that a threat or challenge exists, and in his or her secondary appraisal, that individual would determine that he or she is not equipped to meet said challenge. More recent research, highlighted by Kelly McGonigal in her TED talk “How to Make Stress Your Friend” (watch it here), further…

  • Buddhist Psychology,  Coping Skills,  Happiness & Well-Being,  Mindfulness & Meditation,  Stress

    Acceptance, Non-Attachment & Surrender: How Buddhist Principles Decrease Stress

    I recently watched an episode of “Portlandia” in which Fred and Carrie, discussing all of the political/environmental/social justice issues one can be concerned about, decide to just “give up”. While the video is obviously a spoof and meant to be tongue-in-cheek, as a Buddhist psychotherapist, I couldn’t agree more with their plea to unburden their minds and let it all go! Since Trump became President, I have had numerous clients come to see me for psychological distress (anxiety, rage, etc.) caused by our current political reality. And while I would never tell any of them to just “give up” caring about the topics and issues that interest them, I do…

  • Buddhist Psychology,  Coping Skills,  Happiness & Well-Being,  Relationships,  Stress

    The Stress of Change & Life Transitions: How Buddhist Psychology Can Help

    Many of the harder aspects of life relate to change. Whether you’re undergoing a life transition such as being a newlywed, new parent or new employee, or trying to adopt a new habit, change is something we all struggle with (even when it’s a “positive” change!). Why? Human beings are creatures of habit; recent research on the psychology of change demonstrates that people have a clear and reliable preference for things that have been around longer. Simply put: whether we’re happy in a certain situation or not (ie, a relationship or a career), we believe that longevity implies “good” and that any change (which is always unknown) is “bad”. But why…

  • Happiness & Well-Being,  Mindfulness & Meditation,  Stress

    Stressed Out? How Buddhism Can Help You Find Peace of Mind

    Regardless of the issue or problem – depression, anxiety, stress, etc. – therapy is ultimately about finding peace of mind. We all wish to be happy, at peace, and able to remain grounded amidst life’s ever-changing ups and downs. But what does “peace of mind” really mean? How CAN we be happy and at peace when life will inevitably involve pain? Is it even possible to find a lasting sense of peace and contentment, to ALWAYS be happy? Buddhism – which the Dalai Lama calls “the science of the mind” – offers some extremely illuminating insights when it comes to these questions. The Buddha said “Peace comes from within. Do…