Let the Tears Wash It Away: Reclaim Crying as a Healing Ritual

There are days when the only thing left to do is cry my fucking eyes out. I mean it. When something is hurting my heart, my feelings need to come out in tears. And yet, so often, I clam up. Hold it in. Find distractions. Scroll. Stay busy. Tell myself I’m fine.

But I’ve learned to embrace crying as a sacred release. I invite it. Sometimes, I even coax the tears out with a sad movie, a song or a memory. Not because I’m masochistic but because I know what happens when I let them flow: I feel better. Lighter. More whole.

What Happens in the Body When You Cry & Allow Tears to Flow

Science backs this up. Emotional tears, different from the ones we shed when chopping onions, are rich in stress hormones like cortisol. Crying helps flush these out, reducing tension and activating the parasympathetic nervous system, which soothes the fight or flight response. It also releases endorphins, our natural feel-good chemicals that ease physical and emotional pain.

Crying is a full-body reset. It’s not weakness; it’s wisdom. It’s your nervous system doing its job.

Why We Resist Crying (and Why We Shouldn’t)

But many of us resist it. We’ve been taught that crying is a sign of failure, of being out of control. Especially for women, crying can feel like a liability. We apologize for being emotional. We hide our feelings. We try to “pull ourselves together.”

Here’s what I want to say: Stop apologizing. Your tears are sacred. They are your body’s way of releasing what words cannot – that “This matters.”

How to Make Crying Part of Your Self-Care Practice

So, how do we reclaim crying as a form of self-care?

• Make space for it. Find or create a safe space where you can let go without judgment.
• Invite the tears. If you feel numb, consider watching a poignant film or listening to music that resonates emotionally.
• Stay present. Allow the emotions to surface without trying to analyze or suppress them.
• Practice self-compassion. Remind yourself that crying is part of a natural healing process.

Crying is not about wallowing in sadness – SUFFERING – but noticing it, then acknowledging it and finally, releasing it. It’s about giving yourself permission to feel deeply and let go (or move forward) authentically.

Let the Emotions Flow: An Invitation to Release Your Tears

This month, as part of our self-care series, I invite you to let your tears wash away the things you’ve been holding inside. Let them cleanse you. Let them soften you. Let them remind you that you are ALIVE.

This year, we’re exploring real-world self-care that helps you come home to yourself. Each month, I share simple, grounded ways to reconnect with your body, support your mental health, and create space for what truly matters. If you’d like to walk this path with me, my monthly newsletter offers reflections, practices, and resources to support your growth.

Rachel Gordon, MA, MEd, is a psychotherapist and founder of Humble Warrior Therapy, where she supports individuals in the Denver area with heart-centered, trauma-informed care.